I wish I were better at writing this thing. More regular, I mean. It is difficult to try and recap all of the things that I am doing. It is especially difficult to keep up with myself when I dont even realize just how fast time is moving.
A year ago today I left Denton, TX. I remember that day so vividly because I had been dreading it for months. It was one of those things that I was so excited for but wasn't ready for. I never thought that I would be leaving my family, my friends, Texas and everything that I have ever known behind to move to a place that I had never been before.
I didn't sleep in my bed the night before because I didn't have one in my house anymore. Instead I fell asleep on the living room floor because Britt was sleeping on the couch and not in her bed. The next morning we all went for breakfast at the Old Town Cafe. We chatted as if nothing exciting was going to be happening in the next few hours. We acted as if life was normal. But on the inside I was hurting. I was terrified of having to say goodbye.
After our final MJ impromteu dance party to "Man in the Mirror", I gave my snotty, tear-filled hugs and hit the road. I gave my peace sign one last time while driving down Millers Creek Dr. and was gone. I remember seeing Denton in my rearview mirror as I was going down 35. All of the memories flooded my mind. 4 great years are already over.
Now I am sitting in New York on this rainy afternoon that I have off from work. I still miss my friends, my family and Texas like nothing that I can describe. So much has changed. Instead of working as an intern, I have a full time job. Instead of worrying about money and living paycheck to paycheck I am able to afford the life I live. That part makes me happy. But I think about Texas and the life that I left behind...the people I love that I left behind. Home is so different now. When I'm there people are always barking at me to "leave that Yankeeville" that I live in. I know what a REAL winter is like now. I bought my first real coat this past year...and snow boots. I have one less Grandparent than I did when I left and hugging Britt goodbye still makes me cry but it doesn't hurt quite as bad as it used to. I have a much stronger bond with my family. You dont realize just how much "your people" mean to you until you spend so much time away from them. You beging wishing that you were just sitting in the same room with someone. The conversation does not have to be flowing but just knowing that you are there with someone is so comforting. I am about 10 lbs heavier than I was when I left a year ago...but, Ive never been happier to have eaten so many subs from delis and some of the best pizza and pasta that I have ever tasted! I like to call it food for my soul.
New York has changed me. It has made me a calmer person. A person who appreciates what she already has more than something she can buy off a shelf. I have learned so much about the world and about other people since being here and living with people from all over the globe. I have been able to travel to a different country and have been able to visit with friends while there rather than just seeing the sights. I have already had one year of memories to last a life time. We are going into another summer and the new interns are beginning to arrive. There have already been plans made for the first karaoke night of the summer and Im sure within the next week or so the weather will actually begin to feel a bit warmer.
While I miss everything about the last chapter of my life...I am so happy to be here creating a new one.
I <3 NY.
